quoting buttercup

Buttercup - What a vacant, time wasting little retard. What an empty, worthless life she must lead. I weep for the human race. Really. This is what humans have degraded themselves into being; money grubbing low-lifes with no dignity. I wish I were a duck.

Rapunzel

The teacher incident reminds me of Rapunzel so this is perhaps a good time to talk about her. It was just a few months ago actually that it occurred to me what a schizoid, destructive experience it was attempting to deal with her. On the surface she was usually playing the good grandmother role, happy to see her grandkids and all that. She was subtly disdainful of me when others were around of course but when we were alone she really let me have it. It was as much a question of attitude and tone as anything else but as I grew older it became worse. There are a couple of incidents that I recall but there is one in particular that I can relate that should bring things into focus.

I was living in Vancouver and had come home to see Mom and “Gramma Ho” who was there for a visit. Things were not going that well for me at that time on any level and I made the perhaps ugly mistake of hinting to her that she might remember her in her will.
She told me to “go back to the ditch where I came from.” Mom can perhaps attest to this as she was sitting in the car with us at the time. We were driving to the ferry, it was night and we were just passing Elk Lake. I remember it like it was yesterday.

You would think that I would have gathered myself at that point and recognized her for the cruel person she was, at least in relation to me, but I didn’t because, for a lot of reasons, I had already internalized her assessment. She told me to go back to the ditch and that is essentially what I did. She went back to the pension that she collected for thirty five years.

She did bestow on me though the following little ditty: “Ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.” If she were alive today I would point out that the “with” in “put up with” is not strictly speaking a preposition, it is part of phrasal verb, and therefore probably acceptable even by the Latin grammar upon which the original “Don’t end a sentence with a preposition rule is based.” I would go on to point out that in the entire history of modern linguistics I appear to be the only one to have noticed this. I would point out also that given a translation dictionary, a notebook, pen and a day or so to prepare I could explain all of this in Mandarin, with examples, thereby proving without a doubt what a total and complete fool I am. The song says that there is a crack in everything and that is how the light gets in but I am sure there was not a crack in her disdain for me. It was pure and complete, and I bet she was a lousy English teacher.

the great global warming debate

fred - Anyway, we agree that man is causing part of the global warming. We agree that we should do something about it. I just don't think that it will make any difference and that the final results are not going to justify any major sacrifices.

bob - Now, fred, is that anyway to talk? Most of us have been here from the beginning and know that "Man is probably the sole cause of global warming and there is a lot we could do about it that would represent more of a lifestyle improvement than a sacrafice," would be a more accurate summary of the facts and conclusions gleaned from this debate so far. You know that we know that you know this, and we know that you know that we know that you know it. One could continue in this way indefinitely and doing so would be a good metaphor. I don't have a lot of time for these discussions anymore but thought I'd drop that in because it appears you are forgoting how badly you are losing this debate etc.

fred - Man is no where near being the sole cause or even the major cause of global warming and it he is, there is scant little that we can do about it and if we should be doing something about it, the answer lies in more and faster development to raise standards of living worldwide rather than less.

bob - "The function of the door has remained virtually unchanged over the centuries."

Now, I'll admit that I find life difficult generally but when I noticed that someone had, presumably, been paid to write that little ditty for an interior design publication I realized that nearly anything is possible and so have begun work on my opus. "An Exercise in Pure Reason" it is called and while that might sound like a philosphical treatise it is in fact my memories, pronounced with a great french stress and a french spelling as well I imagine but no matter. Naturally I hope that this work will serve as a fitting companion piece to my abstract nonsensical ramblings here at forumosa, but whereas the abstract nonsensical is available here at no cost "An Exercise in Pure Reason" will likely only be available at whatever price they charge for those books you find in the bargain bin.

In any event, as I'll be busy with the exercise, I won't around here much in the future and as fred wipes a tear from his eye and takes another sip of his cognac I'll.... what'll I do? Go for a hike I suppose. It's suprising how pleasant this tropical weather can be once you get away from the stinking city etc.

magic

There's a saying in the atheist community: Everyone is an atheist about everyone else's religion. To we skeptics (atheists, agnostics, or just generally irreligious people), the assertions of Christianity and other religions are on par with the assertion there are Purple Fire Breathing Bunnies nestled in their heavenly warrens who emerge to bestow reward and punishment on their human followers. "It's ridiculous." "It's just something you made up," "It makes no sense," "You've got no evidence" are all things we skeptics say to Christians and other religious.

I realize, of course, you disagree there is a comparison. However, the attitude you would probably take towards someone claiming adherence to the Purple Fire Breathing Bunnies cult (assuming they really believe it) is the same attitude we take towards Christians and other theists. We perceive little or no difference between the two religions.

I think most Christians and Jews no longer believe in magic. But magic was an assumed reality in the Biblical era. Just think of the witches described in the Bible and the campaigns to eradicate them. Or the plagues that God, through Moses and Aaron, brought against Egypt. When Aaron threw down his staff and it turned into a serpent, Pharaoh's magicians did the same thing (before their staff-snakes got eaten, teehee). For several of the punishments Moses and Aaron brought on Egpyt (through God), Pharaoh's magicians could do the same things: turn the water into blood, bring a plague of frogs, etc. I think when it got to turning dust to gnats the magicians could not match God's power. But the prescence of magicians and the reality of magic are assumed. Divination, witchcraft, and demonic possession were all assumed realities in the Biblical era, and the Bible reflects that. However, aside from fundamentalists, modern Jews and Christians would openly mock someone claiming to have magical powers. It's ridiculous. It's just something they're making up. They've got no evidence.

It's taken for granted nowadays these witchcraft and magic are nonsense and always were. And yet witchhunts were popular throughout the late Middle Ages and Renaissance period. It is precisely because of the increase in scientific knowledge and perhaps most importantly, scientific skepticism, that has turned even the common man against the idea of magic, witchcraft, and wizardry.

But there are other supernatural realities/assertions in the Bible and Christian tradition that ordinary Christians DO still believe in, such as miracles and resurrection. However, we skeptics don't see any difference between magic and miracles, or divination and resurrection. All are equally fantastical and beyond belief. Christians asking us to respect their belief in miracles can expect the same response as if they asked us to respect their belief in magic

plunk

Throwing him [the dog] off Zhongshan bridge into the Danshui might be easier [than having him cremated in a buddhist ceremony]. Then again you wouldn't want poodles washing up at yu2ren2ma3tou2 so I dunno, like, I just dunno, you know? Anyway, I saw a show about Vernasi last night and they were talking about how if you got lucky with the gods or something perhaps the cycle of suffering, birth and death and all that can finally come to an end, but only if you are cremated at Vernasi and thrown in the Ganges which of course is nothing like being a dog and thrown off the Zhongshan bridge in a paper bag. Your dog might come back as hello kitty if you threw him in there.

gao_bo_han - bob,

Don't you think this post was just a *tad* disrespectful? The OP's pet has not even passed on yet, and you're making crude jokes?

bob - I was going more for profound with a despairing nod toward reality than disrespectful, trying to bring a little perspective like, but if I failed I apologize. People love their dogs I know.

hannes - And it's "Varanasi" not "Vernasi".

I buried a dog and a cat back in Germany in our own back yard when I was about 12. The cat wasn't even ours. I remember watching the cat sitting besides the road in front of our house (I was looking out the window of my room). Knowing that the cat -- cats aren't really that smart at times -- would cross the road the minute a car would pass by, I stormed down the stairs, ran out the house and when I arrived a minute later at the spot where the cat had been sitting before, it all had happened already. Man, was I made at the cat. I still remember how it felt to carry the stiff body of the lifeless cat to the back yard.

bob - You probably chased it. I know that people often block these kind of memories as a defense mechanism but the energy still exists and eats away at your soul regardless. The only thing you can do is own your guilt and strive to be a better person in the future. No more drinking, no more chasing cats in front of traffic in ill-fated attempts at kindness, no more correcting spelling mistakes with sentences that begin with the abusive "and" and so on and so forth etc.

hannes - I did help to slaughter a sheep once, I admit. But I didn't make the cat trying to outrun that car.

And Bob, you are mean, and I mean it.

bob - Like innocence, guilt is universal. Sometimes they are the same thing. I, for example, was badly raised and therefore became evil and a bad speller. Is this my fault, am I to blame? Who blames who? Sometimes it is the guilty who blame the innocent come guilty and then what? It is a mess only understandable through the abstract nonsensical and even then only vaguely. At some point one gives up and this is the beginning.

hannes - Innocence, guilt, good, evil... whatever.

The question here is, what to do with a dog that has passed away. I'd say, try to pay the dog your respect by properly saying good bye in one way or another. Throwing it into a river would be evil, and surely make you feel guilty some time afterwards.

bob - Yes, but I would not really throw the dog in the river, at least not without first securing something heavy to his feet. I would purchase a bottle of cognac for the occassion and weep appropriately as the insignificance of his "plunk" into the river reverberated in mine empty soul. Later while contemplating the pervasiveness of evil in the universe I'd pause for a moment at my own guilt. Bleh, I'd say, you can't begin to imagine the shit I've seen people do.

inflamation of the foreskin

Inflammation of the foreskin
Reminds me of your smile.
I've had ballanital chancroids
For quite a little while.
I gave my heart to NSU
That lovely night in June.
I ache for you, my darling,
And I hope you get well soon.

My penile warts, your herpes,
My syphilitic sores.
Your moenelial infection,
How I miss you more and more.
Your dobie's itch, my scrumpox,
Our lovely gonnorrhea,
At least we both were lying,
When we said that we were clear.

Our syphilitic kisses,
Sealed the secret of our tryst.
You gave me scrotal pustules,
With a quick flick of your wrist.
Your trichovaginitis
Sent shivers down my spine;
I got snail tracks in my anus
When your spirochetes met mine.

Gonoccocal urethritis, streptococcal
ballinitis, meningo myelitis,
diplococcal cephalitis, epididimitis,
interstitial keratitis, syphilitic
choroiditis, and antertior u-ve-i-tis.

My clapped out genitalia
Is not so bad for me,
As the complete and utter failure
Every time I try to pee.
My doctor says my buboes
Are the worst he's ever seen,
My scrotum's painted orange
And my balls are turning green.

My heart is very tender
Though my parts are awful raw,
You might have been infected
But you never were a bore.
I'm dying of your love, my love
I'm your spirochaetal clown,
I've left my body to science
But I'm afraid they've turned it down.

Gonoccocal urethritis, streptococcal
ballinitis, meningo myelitis,
diplococcal cephalitis, epididimitis,
interstitial keratitis, syphilitic
choroiditis, and antertior u-ve-i-tis

the beginning

Like innocence, guilt is universal. Sometimes they are the same thing. I, for example, was badly raised and therefore became evil and a bad speller. Is this my fault, am I to blame? Who blames who? Sometimes it is the guilty who blame the innocent come guilty and then what? It is a mess only understandable through the abstract nonsensical and even then only vaguely. At some point one gives up and this is the beginning.